would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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