She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
