then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
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