I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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