Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
