Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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