and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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