with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
