Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
