Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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