no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
