when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
How does it feel to date your dad?
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
