Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
