Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
