I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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