The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
