Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
