I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
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