i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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