is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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