I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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