What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
