I want to have your abortion
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
