a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
