Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
