Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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