I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Sext me about skeletons
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
