Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
