no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
