when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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