I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You smell like a Billy Joel song
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
