yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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