There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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