I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
