on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
