There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
