Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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