There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
