so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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