We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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