the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize