If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
