Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
