where am i from again
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Randomize
