Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
