Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Terrible idea I love it
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
