Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
