this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
