Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
