to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
